crash and burn baby!

looks like my home computer has fallen from the mighty.
the explorer.exe is hogging the cpu, making everything take forever to load/run.

it has been struck down with some kind of malicious malware/virus who knows what.
I have done some research, but cannot seem to find the name of this virus.

Norton Anti virus has failed me. they want to charge me something like $23.00 a minute to have them talk me through removing it. which seems quite silly seeing how it was their software that failed me in the first place.

I could sure use some help. anyone out there know anything about malicious programs and how to find and remove them?

some possible solutions -
- post/email tips suggestions...
- phone call talk me through the fix
- come by and receive free booze and food in exchange for repair
- donate an old computer so that I may get online at home

I've been trying to deal with this for about a week.

help?
I am open to other suggestions too.